The baby story continued... well, after I got so sick Destiny also got very sick. Her symptoms led our family doctor to order some blood work. The results said that she was suffering from mono AND lyme! After doing an extensive amount of reading on each sickness, and comparing my own symptoms I am led to think that mono may have been what was plaguing me as well. The wonderful upside is that mono generally does not have a negative effect on an unborn baby, but it can take every negative pregnancy symptom and magnify it exponentially for the mother, and add a few other miseries as well. In the end my sweet daughter was born healthy, but my body was so exhausted that we ended up having our first cesarean delivery. For Destiny, three weeks of antibiotics helped her to get back to feeling like herself. For me, each labor and delivery has been very different from the others, the last was not an exception. Cesareans are not medically preferred, the nurses all expressed disappointment for me, considering that I even delivered twins naturally. My sweet doctor apologized to me while I was in the recovery room, he said he did all he could, but sometimes that just isn't enough. I assured him that I was extremely grateful for a healthy baby, and I did not feel disappointed. I even have a new outlook on my previous doctor. Ideally birthing would be much safer and less painful, but alas, that is not the way of it. My merciless former doctor seemed to make decisions based on his own schedule and his personal success records, I think several of my previous births would have been managed very differently at the hands of another doctor. Each previous baby was born vaginally and healthy. My former doctor has skills and many successes, but most of my physical recoveries were far more difficult than this cesarean recovery (even with the surgical complication of an alarming amount of blood loss), and the emotional trauma I experienced as a result of my previous doctor's thoughtless words lasted much, much longer than even the physical pain, BUT in the end I am glad that I did not have previous cesareans, because they can complicate future pregnancies. So, if that meant having a heartless doctor that pushed my personal physical limits, then I am grateful. But I would never choose his care again, or recommend him to anyone. I do thank God for His perfect plan, even when I don't understand it at the time. And I am very grateful for modern medicine. As my doctor mentioned in one of the conversations he had with me in the days while I was still at the hospital, once upon a time cesareans were performed knowing that the mother would be sacrificed to save the child. We have come a long way, thank the Good Lord and the hands of the skilled surgeon.
“The wolf shall dwell with the lamb, and the leopard shall lie down with the young goat, and the calf and the lion and the fattened calf together; and a little child shall lead them.” (from Isaiah 11)
“See that you do not despise one of these little ones. For I tell you that in heaven their angels always see the face of my Father who is in heaven." ( from Matthew 18)
"And they were bringing children to him that he might touch them, and the disciples rebuked them. But when Jesus saw it, he was indignant and said to them, “Let the children come to me; do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God. Truly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it.” And he took them in his arms and blessed them, laying his hands on them." (from Mark 10)
"Like arrows in the hand of a warrior,
So are the children of one’s youth.
How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them;" (from Psalms 127)
